The Strings Attached
by Hoshiguma-douji
Summary: (Yuugi x Suika) If we do this without strings attached, then what's tugging at my heart?


Sex with Suika is a game, and one that I will never win. I can make her scream like the little girl she likes to hide beneath, and to me, there's no more beautiful sound in the world than her surrender. But she'll never be mine. She'll never say those little words that mean so much to me.

"It's just sex," she says. "No strings attached."

_Then why are the threads tugging at my heart?_

I've known Suika practically my whole life. We were friends as children, two runaway oni orphans on the move. As teenagers, we rebelled against our tengu captors, and in our young adulthood, we ran the Ooeyama oni community. And all through those years, I've been by her side, fighting the for the causes she believed in.

"We're just friends with benefits," she says.

_How am I benefitting from this torture?_

I watch her leave every morning, fully dressed and barely hung over, ready to face Gensokyo without me. All I want to do is to go with her, to be her lover both on and under the surface. But if I chase after her, she'll know how I feel, and we won't be able to sleep together again. After all, Suika isn't looking for love, only sex, and I'm just her regular slut.

After she passes out beside me, I feel so small, so submissive, a screw toy she plays with when she's lonely and drunk enough. I can't even come anymore, because if I do, I'll confess, and I can't lose any of this. Perhaps I'm more masochistic than I give myself credit for.

I roll over and watch Suika sleep. She's smiling slightly, blissfully unaware of the war inside of me. I want to touch her, not sexually, but intimately.

I run my hand gently over her freckled cheek, and she leans into my touch. I lower my head down, a breath away from her lips. We're so close, and I'd never get to be like this with her if she were conscious.

I know why Suika doesn't want love; she's scared of getting her heart broken. I've been hurt plenty of times in relationships, but I'd risk anything to gain her romantic trust.

Wait.

_I'd risk anything…and all there is to lose is torturous sex._

"I love you," I say aloud. Tears stream down my cheeks. "Gods, I love you, Suika!" I know she isn't listening; she's a deep sleeper, and I bet she could sleep through a nuclear war in this state. I think of this as a practice run for the morning, when I chase after her finally.

I close my eyes tightly, as if that'll stop the rivulets of tears. I wish I wasn't so emotional, so passionate. At times like this, crying makes me feel vulnerable, and that is something an oni like myself should never be.

I kiss her, then. I taste a faint tinge of sake on her tongue and my hot tears on her lips. It's hard to passionately kiss someone unconscious, but I give it my all; I want to kiss her as though this would be our last, because after all, it may be. The very thought of never feeling her like this again makes me cry even harder.

She stirs and groans slightly, then I feel her arms wrap around my hips, pulling me closer. It takes a few moments for my brain to register the facts that she is awake, holding me, and returning the kiss.

I pull away immediately, but I don't stray far; our noses are still touching.

"What the hell was that?" she asks, a slight smirk painted on her kiss-swollen lips.

I emit a shuddering sigh and watch a tear fall from my eyelashes to her cheek. "The truth," I say.

"You love me?" Her doelike, chocolate-colored eyes are studying me carefully.

"You heard me?"

"You're loud. You woke me up. But I wanted to see what you'd do, so I faked being asleep for a little while."

I sigh again. "I've loved you since we were kids, Suika."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you wanted no strings attached."

"That's because I figured you didn't have feelings for me!" She emits a nervous giggle. "See, I've always been in love with you. But you were so powerful, so brave, that I figured you thought of me as a silly friend. I figured the only way I could get you was sexually."

"Damn irony," I mutter before joining our lips again, running my hands over her small breasts. She shivers and reciprocates, her fingers finding the most sensitive spots. Has she not stopped, I would've come then, the side effect of holding back for too long.

"Yuugi," she says against my lips. "Let's not have sex right now."

I pull back. "But this is kind of a sex-worthy moment."

"No." I feel her grin. "Let's make love."

"Damn you," I murmur, deepening our kiss and rubbing her nipples between my fingers. She arches her back, wordlessly demanding more, and I respond by taking one between my teeth.

She yelps out of pleasure and says, "Please, Yuugi!" She pauses to gasp. "Let me…be on top."

Reluctantly, I let her take control. She's so sexed that she's shaking, but she doesn't do anything aside from straddle my hips.

"When I think of lovemaking, I think of massage cream," she says.

I can't help but laugh. Suika's so weird sometimes. "Why?"

"Because it's awesome! Do you have any?"

"Not that I know of."

"Hmm. I'll have to get you some. But we can use mine!"

I scrunch my face at her. "Why did you bring massage cream?"

She disappears under the bed, where her bag was stowed.

She reappears and giggles. "I had a feeling we'd need it, and I was right."

"So…you're going to give me a massage?"

Suika cocks her head to the left. "You could think of it that way."

"What're you gonna do?"

She inspects the label. "Well, it's for external use only, so I can't eat it. That's a shame."

"Why the fuck would you eat massage cream?" Immediately after I ask, I wish I didn't; sometimes with Suika, you just don't want to know.

"I really wanna know if it'd make my tongue vibrate!" she exclaims, as if that was really obvious.

"What the hell…"

"Well, I got this from Marisa, and she said that it's heat activated. Alice really likes it."

"Okay, so…"

"So I'm going to rub it here!" She motions between my legs.

My eyes widen. "You wouldn't dare."

"I would." She grins mischievously.

"Does that even count as external use?"

"We'll find out." She opens the lid and takes a generous amount in her hand. "Stop squeezing your legs together!"

I sigh and spread my legs, my stomach tingling with more nerves than excitement.

"You're gonna love it," she says as she rubs the cream over me.

"It's cold!" I complain.

"Won't be for long. I wish you weren't so wet. It'd be easier to spread."

She's right; it doesn't take long for the cream to heat up. I get a tingling sensation so strong that I gasp a little. "Shit, Suika," I mutter. "You're good."

She grins. "I know I am. So you know why we're doing this, yeah?"

"Because you're crazy?" Somehow, her massage is relaxing and euphoric at the same time. I lay back and close my eyes.

"That, too," she admits, "but it's because I love you, and now that we've established that, we're gonna die of intense pleasure."

I open one eye and watch her massage my core with her left hand as she rubs the cream over her own area with her right.

"You're doing this, too?" My words are so slurred that I'm not sure if Suika understands what I'm saying. My mind is starting to go fuzzy. All I want to do is come and kiss her, but Suika makes a good point; making intense love is the oni way of promising love, after all. I decide that the burning, orgasmic torture my core is going through is a thousand times better than the emotional torture hours before.

"Yep."

_So she _can _understand me. _"Well, can you…hurry up? I'm really close…"

"You're gonna…be closer," she pants, already feeling the effects of the cream. "I'm gonna meet you…halfway."

Before I can ask what she means, she brings our hips together and sighs. We've actually never done this position before because it's so intimate, and the very fact that we're this close makes my heart want to explode from happiness.

Once we start moving, I'm seeing stars. Gods, I love Suika; she's so adventurous, bedroom-wise, and she knows exactly what areas are my weak spots. It's so hard to hold back my orgasm, especially since I'm fast as it is.

"I wanna see…_haaaahn_…how long we can…_ahh_…do this," Suika manages to say. She's already lying down and her eyes are closed.

I try to speak, but all that comes out is a low moan. I can feel my orgasm beginning, and it's at the point where I can't resist it anymore. I'm quivering all over, especially my legs, and I don't have any words to express what I'm feeling.

Suika picks up the pace and squeals. I can feel her contract against me before she screams.

We ride the rush together, blinded by frantic pleasure and deafened by our screams. I feel her moisture over mine before she collapses on top of me, quivering and panting.

"I'm a genius," she slurs, nuzzling my cheek with her nose.

"That was fantastic." I don't even feel like "fantastic" describes what I felt, but I can't think of any other words.

"So, we're official?"

Our brown eyes meet. She's really good at making cute faces, especially since she's so childlike, and the size of her eyes makes me melt beneath her.

"Yes, Suika. We're official."

She grins and kisses me. When we finally pull apart, she asks, "Can I go back to sleep now?"

"Sure," I say.

"On you?"

"Whatever you like, Suika."

She rests her head on my shoulder and her left hand on my breast and closes her eyes.

I kiss the top of her head, right between her horns. "I love you."

"I love you, too," she murmurs. It takes only a few moments before she's asleep.

I'm not tired at all, but I can't move; despite usually being only 147cm tall, Suika is extremely heavy, probably because she's dense. I space out for a while as she snores softly, amazed at the progression of the night. Eventually, I manage to fall asleep beneath her, my arms wrapped around her hips.


End file.
